Ashley Cain concerns fans as he admits he's 'haunted' by baby Azaylia 'passing away in his arms' after leukaemia battle06/01/2021
ASHLEY Cain concerned fans after admitting he's "haunted" by late daughter Azaylia's leukaemia battle.
The 30-year-old star broke down in tears as he recalled his eight-month-old little girl passing away in his arms in April.
Ashley took to his Instagram Story again hours later to reassure his worried followers that he was okay – adding that he would never "give his life up".
Filming himself by his daughter's graveside late at night, the heartbroken father said: "You want to talk about pain, this is my life now as a devoted dad, with the most beautiful baby any father could ask for – this is my life now."
He then showed off Azaylia's resting place, which Ashley and his girlfriend Safiyya have been sure to make "magical" for her – covering the land with stunning lights, stuffed animals, and ribbons.
Ashley went on: "When everything in my life felt bad, I used to see her face – it made everything better, and now I can never do that again.
"I've got to live with that for the rest of my life, and I will come down here every night; I will sit with her for hours, I will talk to her."
With tears filling his eyes, the star went on: "What hurts me the most is… Obviously I miss her and I love her but that's something I can deal with.
"What hurts me the most is the eight months of her life were eight months of pain. A life spent in a f***ing hospital, having chemotherapy, operations every day.
"Not outside walking, not seeing her family. In a hospital room with procedures, and even though she didn't show it I know she was going through pain.
"And I've got to live haunted by the fact that my daughter passed away in my arms, counting her last breath."
Ashley wept: "I feel for that little girl so much."
He then shared a video of the grave's lights flickering in the darkness, writing: "Goodnight, God bless to my daughter, my hero.
"And the strongest, most beautiful person I know, you will live on in my heart, my soul, and my spirit forever."
Ashley's heartbreaking videos worried his followers, forcing the star to return to Instagram in the early hours of the morning to reassure them that he was okay.
He explained: "I know I got in my feelings a bit tonight, but I want everyone to know they don't need to worry about me… My daughter fought so hard for her life that I would never, ever give mine up.
"I'm dedicating the rest of my life to fighting, set up this charity to be sure that other families and children don't have to have it as hard as we did."
Ashley added that all he asked was for continued support from his online following as he vowed to always fight in Azaylia's name.
Ashley's posts came hours after Safiyya admitted that she was "numb" and will "never be the same again" in an emotional tribute to her little girl.
The couple laid their daughter to rest last month following her tragic passing in April.
The devoted parents were sure to give Azaylia the send-off she deserved, and were moved as locals lined the streets to pay their respects as the horse-drawn carriage carrying her coffin passed.
At the beginning of April, heartbroken Ashley and Safiyya revealed that doctors had told them they could no longer treat Azaylia's leukaemia, which she was diagnosed with at just eight weeks old.
The family had just raised over £1million for her to get specialist treatment in Singapore when they were delivered the heartbreaking news, with medics finding tumours throughout her body – including on her brain.
In the weeks that followed, Azaylia needed several blood transfusions as she started to cry blood, and suffer nosebleeds – with purple bruises also appearing on her body as her illness meant that her blood could not clot.
She stopped breathing several times and began to suffer seizures in her final days, with Safiyya and Ashley providing their daughter round-the-clock care alongside their close family members.
Azaylia passed away at home on 24 April, with Ashley and Safiyya both paying emotional tribute as they broke the news on social media the following day.
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